Hey Mom,
If you were still here…
Would you see me,
accept me,
for the person I’ve always been?
Would you have learned to call me
by name?
… by my chosen name?
Would you have come to respect me,
my decision,
my truth?
Would you acknowledge
the parts of me
that look
like you?
Would you see yourself
reflected
in the way I move,
the way I speak,
dance,
care for others,
give from my heart,
and love my children?
Would you still believe
the things
that you told me were true?
The things you taught me,
when I was young?
…that I was special,
beautiful,
talented,
strong,
capable,
sweet,
and loved
un… conditionally.
Would you still
believe
that I could be anyone
and anything
I wanted to be?
That being a good person
was more important
than what people thought
of me?
…or you?
I do.
…because I listened
when you told me.
I watched you
as you taught me
what it was to be strong
in your womanhood.
I believed in you
which made me believe
in myself
in the person
your influence shaped.
I want you to know
that I find peace,
comfort,
and joy
every time I see a glimpse
of you…
…in me.
Whenever I relax,
when I am not worried
about how people see me
how I see myself,
the moments
when I truly drop my guard,
you are there
in my voice
the rhythm of my words
my gestures
and expressions
I hear you in my thoughts
and feel you in my heart.
…and, when I see it,
when I feel it,
I stand a little straighter
and smile a little bigger.
I love you Mom.
~ elr
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