When I was young I would read my daily horoscope to see what was NOT going to happen to me that day. It seems they were always off and never talked about things that were relevant to that day’s events. At a point I stopped looking at them altogether.
I have no need for horoscopes in my life. But today, when I was wading through Yahoo in search of a link to my profile, I saw today’s horoscope.
I was born in June, which makes me a Gemini. To those of you who really know me well, this most likely seems quite fitting. Almost comical actually.
It was amazing how close today’s horoscope is to where my life has been lately. Again, those in the know will understand. It was just not the day I had today. This, as previously stated, is pretty much the norm for me and horoscopes. I thought it was uncannily close and merited a thought or two.
August 15th 2009 – Gemini: Connecting with other people is getting much easier day by day, mostly because you are feeling more comfortable in your own skin. Accepting yourself for who you are — and for what you bring to any relationship, no matter how brief — is the best new trend of the summer and you wear it well. Meeting new people will be easy for you right now because you’re ready to reach out and share a little bit of yourself. The fear of rejection has faded into obscurity.
I have definitely come far. I had been depressed and suicidal for many years, too many to count (well over 30). That is finally behind me now. Now I look to the future with hope.
Will I ever really feel comfortable in my own skin? I will tell you if/when it happens. I can honestly say that it is definitely not the place I am today. But I’m accepting of who I am. Please excuse, but I like me. For the first time in my life, I am okay with who I am as a person.
As far as reaching out and sharing a little bit of myself, yes I am ready to do this. I am working on my testimony to give at church, not because I believe myself worthy, or that I want the attention, but because I believe that God can use it. This will be a very emotionally difficult task, but He has done so much for me and I want others to know that same hope that I have found in Him.
The fear of rejection has indeed been mostly eradicated. I have friends who accept me and truly care about me. To me that is what love really is. Knowing everything about a person and choosing to look past the faults, or differences, and see the human being. They put their trust in me, taking me at my word, and for that I am eternally grateful.
~ elr
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